Stumbling on Sincerity

by Katski

I woke up one morning a week ago and had the strangest feeling of disorientation.

It occurred to me at that moment that — its June.

And for one second, I asked a ridiculously sincere, baffled question: where did the last 6 months go?

Then in the next instant, I remembered:  Still Life happened.

I chased a dream is what happened.

The past half year has been the longest 24 hours of my life.

I suppose it’s nature’s way of protecting you when it recognizes that you’re allowing yourself a rare moment to become — fully realized — by doing something motivated solely by love and dream. Nature seems to know that it must support you in this instant when you concede to its most powerful drivers as it has always intended you to do.

So it creates a coccoon — like a personal force-field designed to shield you from every distraction, allowing you to concentrate fully and wholly on the task at hand. The haven is temporary of course, and reality must intrude at a certain point. We’re still alive in the world and it’s the rudest of awakenings to realize that time is capable of flying at warp speed. Time lands your capsule…or crashes it. You open your eyes suddenly, with a jolt. You look around…

and realize you are not alone. Which makes all the difference. 🙂

  It’s my profound learning that when you’re doing something that is motivated solely  

  by love and dream — you cannot, really cannot do it on your own. It becomes

  imperative to surrender yourself not just to yourself but to everybody else who will

  patiently stand back and allow you to…be.

So you put yourself at the mercy of everybody’s good graces. They give you a proper send-off soaked in good cheer and better wine then drink to your hoped-for success.  And as they wish you all the luck on the journey you’re about to take, you  cross your fingers and hope they’re all still there when you return from this, the greatest of adventures: seeking to know who you are and touching the possibility of all that you could be.

They are friends who will conspire to keep you sane…they are family who will tolerate your insanity with gracious spirits and strained smiles…and then there’s your “special group” — your own Tolkienan fellowship who will go on the journey with you hoping against hope that you are leading them to a place that’s at least better smelling than Mt.Doom.

I have been so blessed and astonished to find that I apparently know so many people with so much good grace to give. All with such high tolerance for foul odor.

This film is truly more theirs than it is mine now. Thank-you is inadequate but thank you.